Nuking The Cat

It is accomplished. [Yeah, you’re actually writing a damn article…what the hell man? – Ed.] I have finally, after many years of dreaming, made the trip that goes by many names: The Crossing, The Nerd’s Hajj…well…okay, I can only come up with those two, besides, I can’t really build it up any further, you know, given that the title already spoils the reveal…so I might as well just get it out of the way. Yes, I’ve finally gone to Tokyo. And yes, if you’re into Anime, Kaiju, gia

What does it say about our world…the fact that a game like Naughty Bear even exists? For some, it will mean a degradation of morality, the glorification of violent behavior and will likely serve as a prime example as to how video games are responsible for all the ills present in today’s society. For me? It means that it’s a damn good time to be alive! The plot behind Naughty Bear is rather simple: Naughty Bear is an outcast on Perfection Island, home to all manner of cute te

It’s plodding. The tutorial doesn’t really serve to be much help as sometimes abilities just come and go or buttons do something that you were never shown or tipped off to. It resembles none of its predecessors, save for what I’ve heard about the Japan-only Dreamcast game. And, for some reason, I always felt that I was playing the game wrong…like there were things I wasn’t doing right or that there were moves that are possible within the interface that I just had no idea h

What? Did you think I was done with the Earth Defense Force games? Get down on the ground and give me 20, maggot! You’re never done with the EDF! And the only time you might come close is if you find yourself as little bits in the mandibles of a giant ant or if we finally manage to kick those aliens off this planet so hard that every single generation of those insect bastards that follows will be born with an unending pain in their thorax…DO YOU GET ME?!? [Maaaaaaybe you m

Now that I’m back to playing the games in the right order, we finally come to Earth Defense Force 2025. The bugs have been gone for 7 years, but now, they’re back. And the EDF is ready…or so they think. But as an enlisted man, was I ready? What about you as a review reader? We’re about to find out as we press start on Earth Defense Force 2025! Having played all three games (EDF 2017, EDF Insect Armageddon and now EDF 2025) in rapid succession, it’s impossible NOT to noti

As you can tell from our last review, yes, I’m an enlisted man now. Who’d’ve thought that the Earth Defense Force was accepting slightly overweight 40 year olds? We’re back and this time we’re going back in time…to the distant year of 2017…as we take a look at the first game in the modern EDF games, Earth Defense Force 2017. This one’s an Xbox 360 exclusive…but I wouldn’t be surprised if it doesn’t show up on a PlayStation system at some point, as the Vita has already seen

Early in the history of the website, we set out to have a section on video games. Given that our last video game review was back in 2015, well, I think we can all see the magnitude of that epic fail. See, the pitfall of game reviews is that the review needs to have the time to go through the game in its entirety…looking for gems and flaws. But who among us in our 30s and 40s has the damn time to go through an entire game anymore? Maybe it’s kids, maybe it’s a bullshit job…h

Master Chief has gone rogue. Or, at least, that’s what Microsoft wants you to believe about Halo 5. And, strictly speaking, they’re technically right. Master Chief does indeed disobey orders in order to attempt to rescue Cortana from the Forerunner technology she now finds herself a part of. The question is, does it count as ‘going rogue’ when those giving the orders are insufferable douchebags??? The flaw with Halo 5 is very similar to the movie adaptation of World War Z

Thank you Platinum Games. You brought me back to my Xbox One after Batman Arkham Knight pushed me away. But also, thank you for pulling the Transformers video game franchise out of its downward spiral. A brief history lesson: Activision’s Transformers games mostly fell in two camps, movie tie-in games ranging from meh to suck and games based on a “Unified” G1-inspired continuity which were generally accepted with positive feedback ranging from good to awesome. Their most re

There are certain facts in life: death, taxes, a collectible drought lasting a few months followed by an unending, expensive onslaught of must-have toy after must-have toy…and that any Superman video game (thus far) will range from meh to suck. Many like to point back to the very first Superman game ever released, back on the Atari 2600 released in 1978. But come on…that’s really not fair. That’s like saying “Maaaan 2-year-old baby, you suck because you can’t do a quadrupl

It was the biggest pain in the ass getting this set up. I feel like I have to get that out of the way right off the bat. But it was soooo SOOOOOOOOO worth it! When you do a search on the Google for Hyperkin’s Retron 5, you’ll come across many things, positive reviews, negative reviews, complaints, praises, controversy on the emulators used and so on and so forth. I’m here to tell you the story in the guise of a review. This story will have its dark moments, but it has its

It had to come to an end, didn’t it? You see, we were on such a good run. Sure, the video games associated with each of the movies, Transformers, Revenge of the Fallen and Dark of the Moon ran the gamut from “meh” to “suck”. But we got spoiled. War for Cybertron gave us the Transformers game we’d all been waiting for and Fall of Cybertron expanded on that by giving us the chance to summon strikes from Metroplex, play as a combiner and rampage as Grimlock. But on top of th